Baby Nicola’s Diary

Baby Nicola kept a diary for her first year - I'm afraid a few of the words and phrases might be unfamiliar to readers in the USA!

Oct 4th - We had a lovely time today. We were supposed to going out in the car so we waited until our mummies were just ready to leave when we both did dirty nappies. That was fun. Then we had a nice sleep until we reached a place called a cemetery where one of Mummy's friends lives . It was a funny place because all the stone have names just like people - we found a stone with the same name as me but I thought I was the only Nicola in the whole world.

Oct 8th - My mummy's mummy finally came to see me yesterday. It made my mummy cry so I joined in too. I don't know why big people make personal comments about babies, I know I don't have much hair and I know I have little short legs so you don't need to tell me. If I told her she had grey hair and wrinkles she would have thought I was very rude.

Oct 10th - Mummy has been explaining at breakfast the difference between being good and being bad. I think I must be a slow learner because I know she has told me about not going to the toilet in the baby bath before. Smiling at strangers counts as being good but it is a bit of a shock when somebody suddenly peers at you from very close but now I know crying when that happens is bad.

Sitting quietly while daddy reads to me is good but eating the book is bad. I don't know why though. But the naughtiest thing of all is going all stiff legged when I'm being dressed or being put into the car. That always gets a reaction.

Alice and I are awake at the moment. Mummy Ella isn't though - unless you can read a book with your eyes closed. Aunty Eve is in charge and is doing a job that is "far too hard for daddy" - it is called paying the bill for the electricity.

Oct 12th - We went to an auction yesterday. It was very crowded so our mummies had to carry us while they looked at things. When the auction started the people in charge found them a special place to sit so having a baby does have some advantages.

Every time I made a noise the auctioneer pretended I was bidding which made people laugh at me and I love being the center of attention! I think I must have fallen asleep because the next thing I can remember is being in the pub (again). Alice and I remembered what we had been told about the difference between being good and bad so instead of crying we made faces at people and that made them laugh at us again.

I think I was a good girl almost all day.

Oct 16th -We had fun today. We drove to a park-and-ride and then went on a bus. I hadn't been on a bus before and mummy sat me so that I could look out of the window. I saw lots of things I hadn't seen before like a broken down police car and a man who kept falling over and singing. We did lots of going in and out of shops but neither mummy actually bought any clothes. They told Alice and me that it was all our fault they needed different size clothes, but how can it be our fault?

I had a sleep in the buggy and on the bus but I woke up in time to see the car having a feed. Mummy said it drinks petrol that costs lots of money. I must be cheaper to run than a car because my food is free. Just before we got home Alice was very smelly. So smelly that mummy had to stop driving and change her "before we all suffocate". I think shopping is fun and I hope we can go again.

Both our mummys are now doing their post-natal exercises with more energy than they did before. I wonder why that is?

Oct 18th - Mummy and I went out on our own today to see a doctor because I am 6 weeks old. This person made all sorts of personal comments about me like lots of people seem to do. She counted my fingers and toes and checked that all my different pieces were in the right place. Then she made a loud noise behind me, even louder than the noises Alice makes, and that made my jump and cry a little bit. This was supposed to be a good thing to make me cry!

But a little bit later I did something that must have been very good. I did something called a smile and that made mummy very happy. She phoned my aunty up straight away to tell her what I had done. Just so nobody would think that I was good all the time I then did my stiff leg game when mummy was trying to dress me. That always works well and we had another talk about the difference between good and bad things.

Alice doesn't do smiling yet but I'm practicing because smiling makes people take notice of me.

I'm kind of lost here...

Also very lost...but very curious...

 

You are not the only ones...

I would like to comment, but maybe you should introduce yourself first, tell us about yourself etc. I see the "random" posts everywhere and I can't seem to put them together to form any kind of idea about you.

So, maybe a little introduction is in order first and foremost.

I'm Eve and I'm a teacher and I am the Mother of Alice. I house share with Ella who is a legal office manager who is the Mother of Nicola. I was abandoned at birth, went through a series of foster placements but ended up in a Children's Home. Ella was taken away from her parents after physical abuse and ended up in the same Children's Home as me. We are married to 2 lovely men and live in the UK

Most of our friends went through the same process - fostering then Children's Home - and most have had major problems with infertility. Three major causes for this, long term malnutrition during childhood and/or long term stress during childhood and/or mental or physical injury during childhood.

Nicola's diary is just a bit of fun, looking at parenthood from the child's perspective.

Now this makes more sense, I get the diary and it's fun, but just putting it out there was well, a bit random...

Welcome!

Oct 21st - Mummy dressed me in my new woolly suit today because we went going out. Alice decided she didn't want to come so she was able to stay in the warm. Lucky Alice is all I can say.

We went to a big building with a pointed top where an old looking man with a grey beard is supposed to live. There were lots of other mummies and daddies there with babies so it was rather noisy. We sat near the back in case I was naughty but I was a good girl the whole time. I didn't see the old man even once so perhaps he wasn't there today?

Mummy did a bit of singing but it wasn't any of the songs she normally sings. I kept on waiting for the "wheels on the bus" song but it never happened. One time I saw mummy with her eyes closed so perhaps she was having a little sleep. It got a bit boring but just before I made a fuss all the mummies stood up. Mummy wanted to avoid speaking to somebody there so we walked very quickly to the car.

I don't think church is much fun for babies. Making faces at daddy or Alice is better.


Oct 24th - Mummy has just pretended to faint. She did a on-line shopping order and it came to over £131.00. She has announced that, "We are all going to have eat less!". When she said that I hope she didn't mean Alice and me because when we get hungry we make a lot of noise. Anyway my food doesn't come from Sainsbury's does it?

I've done all my different types of crying today. I did my bored cry at 03:30, my hungry cry at 06:30 and my I'm wet and dirty cry a few minutes ago. It will soon be time for the bored cry again because Alice is asleep and Aunty Eve is on the computer and Mummy Ella has fainted. Perhaps if I make baby noises and then do some smiling people will notice me!

I wonder if we will play the hiding from the vicar game again today?


October 28th Our mummies went out without us yesterday and left the daddies in charge. They must have been feeling very brave to agree but they managed fine. We discovered a new fun game to play which is called the blowing on my tummy game. When they do that it makes me wave my arms and legs around a lot which makes them laugh.

Alice and I behaved very well and we didn't do our bored cry once. We did some reading together although I think Alice doesn't really understand what books are for. We told her not to eat the book at least twice. Then we watched a DVD with our daddies explaining to us about cricket. There seemed to be lots about people going in until they are all out when the other sides goes in until they are all out as well. It was all rather complicated so I had a little sleep.

I don't think daddy knew about the hiding from the vicar game because he let her in. The vicar wants to wash my hair in church which seems strange to me. Daddy said it was up to me to decide which the vicar thought was the right answer so she left us alone.

I was pleased when mummy came back and I did my biggest smile.

I think I know who you are, you joined a while back on the moomy forum right? asking about the possible link between infertility and foster care? the emotional impact? if so, welcome, if not welcome in anyway! xx

Nov 1st - Alice and I went to our first Mother and Baby meeting today (our mummies came to). The mummies sang some songs and all the babies waved their arms and legs in time to the music. The mummies had tea or coffee but all the babies I saw had milk. All the mummies seem to suffering from something called sleep deprivation.

Behind the village hall there was a big field with strange white animals. Some had legs at all four corners but mummy Eve said some had been harvested which is why some others were lying down. Mummy then got some mess on her shoe and I think she said a naughty word. On the way back we had to feed the car again which always makes her grumble.

When we got home I played the stiff legs game again which is one of my favourites.

Nov 6th - Alice and I are in favor at the moment! We were put to bed just before 10PM last night and neither of us woke up until 6AM! It seems that this is a good thing and that we should be doing this every night.

I was very hungry when I did wake up and I wanted to be fed straight away without any other jobs being done first. Mummy says I was a bit rough with her and that I am expected to be patient. I don't think Alice and I are very good at being patient.

Today the postman came when I was in the middle of my bath and I made a fuss when Mummy Ella took me out before I had had my usual splash and kick. She was then telling Auntie about bills again. This is the second time I have heard her complaining about bills and I still don't understand where ducks' bills fit into things.

I have decided that doing a smile when I'm being naughty stops it being naughty and that things that are naughty in the middle of the night are not naughty during the day. It is very confusing being a baby


Nov 10th - Alice and I went to a craft fair today with our mummies and Aunty Didi and Aunty Magda. We saw some friends there and they were told that I am "a placid little soul" - Alice isn't.

We saw a book about a noisy baby and all the grown-ups thought it should have been about Alice. Its a good thing she was asleep through all this. I was carried around so I could see all the stalls. One of them had lots of teddy bears but they were not as nice as mine. He lives at the head of my cot and guards me when I am asleep.

I made a really important discovery this week. Mummies and daddies are not the same shape!! This came as a big surprise. They are different not just upstairs but downstairs as well. I think I must count as a mummy then?

Nov 13th - We went to the pointy topped building again yesterday but the God person didn't turn up. This is the second time so perhaps he was busy with all those other churches to visit. And we didn't do a single nursery rhyme! I spent ages looking at the person sitting behind me. He was very old and when most of us stood up he didn't bother. How lazy. Mummy got caught by the vicar but the head washing game has been postponed until I am old enough to decide for myself.

I heard a new word today. It was contraception. Mummy said it to Daddy and then looking meaningfully at me.


Nov 25th - I don't think mummies and daddies should tell babies things that are not true. Daddy says politicians tell lies all the time but I don't think parents should. Daddy told me that I came out of mummies tummy and that my mummy came out of grandma's tummy. That isn't possible. My mummy would not fit into grandma's tummy so she must have come from somewhere else. It is all a big puzzle.

On Thursday we did our weekly trip out to meet other babies. Some look like me and Alice but some have got hair on the top of their head, that makes them look strange. We were taught some old nursery rhymes. Some of them were quite violent, like the one about somebody falling off a wall (Humpty Dumpty) and people dropping dead (Ring a ring of Roses). Strange things to sing about I think.

I was allowed to touch the two cats today. They are called Romulus and Remus and they are jolly old. They do everything together like our mummies do but they don't ever seem to change their clothes!! They have been wearing the same black woolly suits for ages. They must need a good wash by now?


Nov 28th -   I have just learned how to do something new today! I managed to roll over which makes me jolly clever because Alice cannot do it yet. One minute I was lying on my back having a big wriggle and the next minute I was face down! Both our mummies were very pleased at this - they turned me back over to see if I could do it again and I did.

In our house we have a washing machine for clothes and a different washing machine for plates. Alice and I seem to make lots of clothes dirty so the special machine is used a lot. But poor old Romulus and Remus (cats) have to lick their own clothes clean. I know this is true because I saw them doing it today.

We were given a new book today by the lady opposite. It is all about some animals that are very fierce called lions. Mummy pretended to be a lion and jumped on top of Aunty Eve when she thought Alice and I were asleep. Aunty Eve didn't look very scared so she must be very brave.

Dec 20th - Mummy was telling us a sad story today. It was about a baby that had an invisible father and only one mummy. Now all the babies I know have 4 grown-ups to look after them so I don't think that is very fair. This baby didn't even have a proper cot to sleep in and didn't have a bear to guard them when they are sleep either. As I said it was a very sad story.

The only happy bit was some kind people gave this baby some gold. So at least the baby could go shopping to buy Christmas presents. I wonder if there were lots of toy shops in Bethlehem?

Romulus and Remus were listening to the story with Alice and me. They didn't seem very interested - perhaps they didn't understand all the long words? I've forgiven Remus for hitting me with his tail, I don't bear grudges!

Dec 24th - It has been a busy day today. Lots of our mummies friends are coming for the day tomorrow so there has been lots of cooking going on and Alice and I have been in the kitchen most of the time. The daddies have been pretending to help but I don't think they are very good at doing what they are told. Romulus helped by eating a sausage that fell on the floor, I don't even think that the grown-up noticed but I did.

This morning I was given a present by a very old person who lives near us. I enjoyed playing with the noisy paper but the box inside the paper wasn't very exciting so I just dropped that. A bit later I did something very clever. I did my stiff legs game and managed to support my own weight for short time. That made all the big people smile so I suppose it must have been a good thing to do. Normally I do stiff legs when I'm being changed but this time it was different.

Alice and I were read a bit more of the sad story about the baby today. I know he did get a few presents but nothing that would be of any use to a baby. Perhaps they didn't have picture books in those days? We did some counting as well - we have lots of cards but I lose count when it gets to big numbers like 5. I think mummy Ella said we had over 50 cards on the computer and 20 through the letter box.

Dec 28th - I woke up early this morning so I thought I would have a talk to the bear that guards me when I'm in my cot. I think the bear must have been asleep because I didn't get any answer. Alice didn't say anything either but in the end my daddy came in so see me and we had a little cuddle. I then made a big fuss when he put me down again because I was feeling so bored and it woke mummy up and she came in my room as well.

She decided to give me a early breakfast which is why I'm downstairs at 5 in the morning!

I have had a lovely time this Christmas. I have had lot of different bits of noisy paper to play with plus some boring boxes. All the people that came to dinner took turns to look after me although I don't think some of the other daddies were very keen on the job when I was smelly. Alice and I have each got a piggy bank and they both must have full tummies because lots of people put money in them for us. I saw one daddy eat some of the money he won as a prize which I don't think is what you are supposed to do.

Jan 1st - Dear Mr Bear, I'm sorry I was a bit sick over your head this morning. My tummy was so full of mummy's milk that some of it overflowed out of my mouth and over you. Mummy cleaned you up nicely, was it fun in the washing machine whizzing round and round?

All six of us went shopping yesterday but I don't think either Daddy enjoyed it very much. We didn't visit a single toy shop and I know that boys and Daddies like toys to play with. One thing that we did get was a lion that is going to look after Alice at night. I wonder if a lion is a fierce as a bear?

All the Father Christmas's seem to have vanished, Mummy thought that he had gone back to the north pole where he lives. I find shopping quite tiring and I was glad to get home back into the warm cot for my afternoon sleep.

Jan 4th We do lots of singing in our house. Everyday Alice and I sit on our mummies knees and they sing songs to us, sometimes I try to join in and that makes the grown-ups laugh at me. Mostly it is nursery songs but when they are practicing for a concert they sing proper songs instead. I don't think our cats like the singing and they go away into the kitchen when the noise starts.

Another thing I am getting good at is making the toys talk. If I reach up I can bash them as they hang above me in my cot. When I do that in the morning people know that I am awake and that I'm soon going to want my breakfast. But the cleverest thing I have ever done was yesterday when I was lying on my tummy. Somehow I managed to move forward a little bit and I was able to reach a toy that had just been too far away for me to reach before. Both mummies clapped their hands at that so it must have been very good.

I think my mummy must be very brave. We went into a shop yesterday and a lady cut part of her head off. And then it fell on the floor! And mummy didn't cry even a little bit despite the hairdresser being so cruel to her. I bet Daddy isn't so brave.

Jan 7th - I'm a bit puzzled. I was sitting in the grown-up's bedroom when I noticed something very strange. They don't seem to have any animals to guard them when they are asleep! Alice has a lion and I have a bear but the mummies and daddies don't seem to have anything. That seems very dangerous to me.

It was fun sitting with Alice on the big bed. Mummy would pull me up to a sitting position "to make my arms strong" then she would let go of me. Sometimes I would stay sitting for quite a long time before I would fall over onto the soft bed. Usually I fell backwards but once I nearly bumped my nose. I am much better than Alice at sitting up because I'm so much older than her.

I must stop writing know because it is time for my bath.

Jan 10th - I got scared yesterday and so I did one of my super deluxe wails. Somebody I didn't know came into my room just as I was waking up and picked me up from my cot. It wasn't either of my mummies or daddies and they had funny round things in front of their eyes. I though some monster was coming to eat me and so I was scared. I don't know what the bear who is supposed to guard me was doing all this time - not doing his job I'm sure.

I made lots of noise and mummy came running in to rescue me. I don't know how this monster had got into the house. Perhaps they came dome the chimney like Father Christmas does? As soon as I was in mummy's arms I felt safe again and I stopped crying. We went downstairs and there was another grown up there who looked a bit like the monster but without the strange eyes and I allowed them to hold me just to show that I am not silly all the time.

Later on mummy told the other grown-ups what had happened and they each gave me a cuddle. That make me feel very special.

Jan 13th - Alice and I went shopping this morning with our Daddies while our Mummies had a sleep. When we go out with our Mummies everything is very organised. We have a shopping list and we only buy things that are on the list. Daddies are not the same as Mummies - they just wonder around picking things up and didn't seem to have a list at all. We also went to parts of the shop we don't normally see which was fun. It seems as if they "just had" to buy a computer game but it doesn't look much like food to me. It would fit in the toaster though so perhaps it is?

They got so tired that had to sit down in the cafe for a rest. First it was a drink with smoke coming out the top just like it was on fire. Then it was a cake and then a newspaper. We were allowed to sit on their knees watching all the people. Most of them smiled at us so we must be jolly nice - even Alice!

Jan 16th - It has been a bit cold in our house so Mummy Ella went out into the garden and came back with some black lumps that she put in the fireplace. Then she rubbed a stick along the side of a box and there was suddenly a bright light on the end of the stick which she used to attack these black lumps.

These black lumps are jolly fierce once they come inside the house so they have to live in a cage so they cannot attack Alice and me. After a few minutes I could see funny lights all around the black lumps and the room started to get warmer. That was a good job because it was about then that Alice decided to be super smelly so she was changed just outside the cage. I think the old electric fire is easier than all this and I don't think that coal will ever catch on. The two cats like this special fire and they are curled up near it. I hope they don't get too hot and start to burn.

Our daddies are in trouble. They managed to buy a computer game but forgot to buy any milk when they were allowed to go shopping on their own. Are all daddies this silly?

Jan 19th - I woke up nice and early this morning so I rattled my hanging toys until somebody came to rescue me. I was allowed to go into the big bed with the grown-ups until it was time to feed me. It was lovely and warm in their bed and daddy sang some songs to me while he was listening to the cricket.

Yesterday was a funny day. When I looked out of the window everything was white. This white stuff is dangerous so neither daddy went to work. Instead they made a new person who is allowed to live in our garden for a few days. When they were trying to put the head on this person it fell off and rolled into the wall. That made them laugh a lot although I think having your head fall off must be horrid. How can you eat without a head?

The daddies did all the cooking yesterday. That way they could have chips and they like chips! Alice and I didn't go outside at all because it was too cold and that was sad making because I like wearing my woolly suit.

Jan 22nd - I have been involved in a big mystery today. It was called the mystery of the missing mitten! We were running out of food at home so our mummies dressed us up in our smart woolly suits so we could go to the supermarket. When we set off I was wearing two mittens to keep my hands warm but when we were nearly finished shopping mummy Eve noticed that one of my mittens had vanished. We walked up and down the aisles looking for the mitten but in the end it turned up under my bottom. It was a big puzzle to them how it got there!

We visited a special room in the supermarket where you can change your baby. I don't know what you can change a baby into because it doesn't say that on the door. Both Alice and I needed changing so after all that bother we all went to the cafe. The mummies had a drink so then we wanted one as well so they covered us up with a shawl so we were not able to see other people while we were feeding. I suppose they thought the people would distract us "from the job in hand"!

Then we went home to watch the black lumps in the fireplace start to shine. I don't really understand fire. Neither does Alice.

Jan 26th - I like reading books with the grown-ups. My favourite one is the book about animals and the different noises they make. It is a bit frustrating when grown-ups ask me, "What noise does a cow make" because in my head I know the right answer but I just cannot make my mouth make the right noise.

I got a shock this morning. I was changed in front of the fire and Romulus the cat suddenly licked me on my foot. He has a very rough tongue and it gave me a shock when I felt it touching me. Then he started making a funny noise which daddy said was called purring. I must be very special because our cats don't just purr for anybody. I don't think the cats like the snow because when they are put outside to go to the toilet they rush in again very quickly. Perhaps the snow makes their tummies feel cold?

Alice woke up in the night and had a big cry. Somehow she had managed to kick most of her bed clothes off so I supposed she was feeling cold. I on the other hand being much older am more sensible as well.

Jan 29th - We all went shopping for clothes today. Now our two mummies have been doing their exercises properly they can fit into the same size clothes they used to wear. That has made them very happy. But Alice and I seem to have grown so lots of money had to be spent on bigger clothes for us. I've got a very smart jumper that I'm already wearing.

The fierce black lumps that were living in the fireplace have been moved back into the garden. Perhaps they were too dangerous to have living in the house all the time? Mr Snowman has also gone away, perhaps he had a better offer from another family. He sees to have left his eyes behind as I can see them lying on the grass.

Our mummies played the being lions game today. They lie on the sofa and pretend to eat each other: they like that game! On Friday they are appearing in a singing competition and somehow Alice and I are going to be involved as well. I'm a bit worried because I don't do singing.

Feb 2nd - Alice and I won a prize yesterday. We won £5 each which has been put into the tummies of our special pigs for when we are older. Our mummies sang a special song about us but it wasn't until the last verse that the people watching realised that the song was about us. For the first two verses we were out of sight with our daddies holding us but then they carried us out so all the people could see us. The song was called "The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face".

And the first time ever I lay with you
I felt your heart so close to mine
And I knew our joy would fill the earth
And last till the end of time my love
It would last till the end of time my love

Alice and I were well behaved although the noise and the bright lights were a bit frightening.

I did something else very special today. I had my first proper food. It was called "Baby Rice" and I opened my mouth so wide for some of the spoonfulls that daddy thought I looked like a baby bird.

Feb 5th - Yesterday we all did something really exciting - we went on a train to see Aunty Didi. Trains look a bit like the park-and-ride bus because they are long and thin but they don't seem to have a driver so I don't know how the train knows which way to go.

It was exciting sitting on the little table as we whizzed along but mummy had to keep hold of me in case I fell over. There were not many people on the train so we were all able to sit together which made it more fun. One time the train stopped were it wasn't supposed to and I was able to see into a place where there were lots of cars all piled up in heaps. It must have been a really nasty accident for them to bump into each other like that.

Aunty Didi met us at the other end and I gave her one of my biggest smiles because I know she is one of mummy's special friends. Didi lives in a big house called a hotel. It is too expensive to eat there of course so we went to a pub down the road instead. Alice and I were good all day - not smelly even once. We also went into a shop to buy something for my daddy's birthday. I am under orders not to tell anybody what we got him in case in spoils the surprise.

Feb 8th - We went to the Country Park yesterday and our Mummies pushed us all the way round the blue route. They told us that there might be some fierce animals called squirrels that we needed to look for. But they didn't tell Alice or me what a squirrel looked like which was silly of them. I know you have to run aware from fierce animals or put them in a cage but I'm not very good at running yet. Luckily we didn't see any of them so we were safe.

After our long walk we went into the cafe and because I was getting too hot mummy took the top half of my woolly suit off. This meant that people could see my lovely smart jumper that I'm very proud of. On the way home we saw a fire engine with a blue flashing light just like in one of my books. I don't understand how the blue light puts fires out but I suppose that is why they have one. I was getting tired so mummy put in me in my cot and I had a long sleep. It is hard work being a baby!

Feb 14th - I met a new grown up yesterday. Her name is Cindy and she is an expert nappy changer. She came to see Mummy Eve and Mummy Ella for lunch but when I needed changing Cindy did it very quickly while the others were busy in the kitchen. I had something different for my lunch. It is called porridge and it comes from bogs in Scotland. The porridge also some some red bits in it that are called fruit. I liked the taste and it was fun having Cindy feeding me.

Cindy isn't as old as my mummies but she is a lot older than Alice and me. Cindy is very thin and I think she was a bit scared when she first came in the house. But when she saw 2 babies she became happier and started talking to us. She works in a special place where some mummies and daddy's store their children when they are working.

I like it when people help me to stand up. I can see what is going on much better and more people can see my smart clothes. Cindy liked my new jumper so she must be very sensible.

Feb 17th - Alice and I were very brave today. We allowed our mummies and daddies to go out without us and we didn't cry once. Our new friend Cindy looked after us while they were out for 1 hour and ten minutes having their Sunday lunch. Cindy fed us some rice, some porridge and some milk for our dinner. She also cooked her own food in a special machine that lives in our kitchen. It goes round and round and makes strange beeping noises that Romulus and Remus don't like when the food is ready.

Once we had our dinners I kept looking round for my mummy and daddy but I couldn't see them and I was just starting to feel a bit sad when Cindy started singing a special song called the "No tears please, thank you very much" song. That made me feel better. When the rest of them did come home I got excited and all sorts of funny noises came out of my mouth.

Cindy then gave us both a kiss and Mummy gave her some money to put in her piggy bank. I tried to say thank you but didn't manage it quite right.

Feb 21st - Yesterday we went in the car to visit my daddies Mummy and Daddy. It seems strange to think that daddy was inside this old ladies tummy and I'm not sure they have told me the truth. When we arrived I was hungry so they put me in my special chair so I could have some rice. They spread an old sheet out on the floor all round the chair in case I made any mess but I was a good girl. I haven't quite managed the getting the food onto the spoon and then the spoon into my mouth part of eating so I led Daddy do it for me.

Once I had my rice and some milk I was ready for a cuddle. When I meet new grown-ups I like to stare at them really hard to see if they are fierce. If they are not fierce I usually give them a little smile and that seems to make them like me. We went for a little walk in my buggy down a rather muddy lane and I saw a new animal that I hadn't seen before except in books. It was called a horse. This horse was called Candy and had very big teeth so I didn't want to pat its head and kept turning my head away.

On the way home we had to feed the car and then I had a little sleep. When I saw Alice again I was very pleased and those strange noises came out of my mouth again.


Feb 26th - We had an exciting time yesterday. We all went into a special shop that was full of toys for children – not for Daddies. We were pushed along in our buggies up and down all the rows and we saw lots of strange things. I even saw the bear that guards me when I’m asleep sitting on a shelf, perhaps he was visiting his friends?

We also saw a row of babies sitting in a row. They were sitting very quiet and still and smiling at everybody. I wonder if could swap Alice for one of these as Alice isn’t usually quiet or still! Because we had been such good girls our mummies got us a little present each. We each have a stuffed Humpty Dumpty to look after now. I’m getting a bit better at holding on to things but the grown- ups sometimes have to help me a bit.

Mummy Eve had some spaghetti for her lunch. And she says that I’m the messy eater.

March 2nd - Instead of meeting on a Thursday our Mummy and Baby Group met on Friday. That was because we went on a big adventure. We went to a school to see a concert and a puppet show. The school was jolly large, much bigger than our house and full of children who can do walking and talking without being helped. They were all bigger than Alice and I am - perhaps they get more to eat?

We sat near the back of the hall in case we got bored or started to make too much noise. Luckily we were good girls the whole time. I sat on my mummy's knee so I could see what was happening. Most of the time I was watching all the grown-ups sitting near me or making funny faces at Alice. The best part was when all the people there sung a few songs I knew. Mummy helped me wave my arms and legs in time to the music.

After the concert we went to talk to the puppets. One of them was very shy and kept hiding her face. I know just how she feels.


March 6th - My daddy helped me fly last night! I was lying on the mat in front of the fire when suddenly I was flying around the room right up near the roof. It was very exciting flying around the room and then coming in to land on Mummy's knees. Those funny noises came out of my mouth again because i was having so much fun.

I can lift my front half off the ground. I can also lift my back half off the ground. But not both at the same time. It makes the grown-ups laugh at me when I keep trying. But I have discovered that if I keep doing this I do move forward a little bit each time. Yesterday I was able to reach my Humpty Dumpty toy who had rolled just out of reach without any help.

I tried baby apple food for the first time at tea time but I didn't like it so I made a big fuss. Ten minutes later daddy tried again and I decided to eat it after all. Babies are like that - wilful!

March 9th - We had some fun this afternoon. We went to see my Daddy play a game called hockey. Lots of daddies were running round hitting a ball with sticks. It seemed very cruel that the ball had to have this done to it. I don't think Daddies team did very well because they didn't score a single goal and the other team scored lots.

One of the other daddies was very naughty. He was told that he wasn't allowed to play with the other players and he came over and stood near us for 10 minutes. One time the ball came quite close to me but mummy stopped it with her foot so that it didn't bump into my buggy. She said that some of the dangerous white stuff is going to fall out of the clouds when I'm asleep. Perhaps the snowman will come back to live with us again? It was very cold watching the hockey but Alice and I had lots of clothes on so we stayed nice and warm.

At the moment I'm sitting in the washing up basket in the kitchen. I can see the cats are washing each other. I'm jolly glad that mummy doesn't want me to lick Alice clean!


March 12th - I must be the cleverest baby in the world. I have learned how to do lots of new things this week and I am making the grown-ups laugh a lot.

If I lift the front of my little dress up I can make mummy disappear! That gave me a bit of a shock the first time I did it - when I let it drop again she had come back! I was so pleased that I made a new noise which is called laughing. I played that game lots and lots of times in a row.

I have managed to get my back half off the ground at the same time as my front half. I can sway backwards and forwards but I haven't quite got the moving in the direction I want to go worked out yet.

But the bestest thing I have done is I can write! On Mummy's Day I put a big kiss on a special card. Daddy only had to help me a little bit because I'm so clever! Then I dropped the pencil onto Romulus' head and that gave him a bit of a shock.


March 15th - I got a big surprise last night. Usually it is the daddies that put Alice and I to bed but my daddy is away at the moment so Mummy Eve took me upstairs instead. I was lying in my cot when I suddenly heard his voice. I looked round but I couldn't see him and I got confused by all of this. Then mummy put a little box next to my ear and I could daddy singing our special bedtime song and I got very excited and starting waving my arms and legs around and making that strange laughing noise.

This morning I could tell that the grown-ups were feeling a bit sad. They don't like it when somebody is missing. So I was a good girl about having my milk and then my porridge because I thought that would make them happier. But they still seemed sad. I hope my daddy comes back soon. Mummy says babies need a routine - well I think that grown-ups need one as well.

March 18th - I didn't know that grown-ups got impatient and excited just like babies do. I was sitting on mummy's knee having a cuddle when the phone rang. It was my daddy phoning to say he was at the airport and that he would be back home in 2 hours. He has been a long way from us, in a place called Germany. Mummy got very excited and stopped being a bit sad and became very happy instead.

When he got home we all had a special cuddle with him. Mummy tried to eat him while he lay on the sofa. He must be very brave because he didn't try to fight her off. When it was my bedtime it was nice that he was able to tuck me into my nice warm bed. Then he sung our special song and gave me and the bear that guards me a kiss. Then he went over to Alice and did the same thing to her, except she has a lion in her cot.

I think Alice's daddy was glad to have him back. He said he was worn out - but he had a happy smile on his face when he said that - I will never understand grown-ups.


March 21st - Today I managed to crawl all the way from the lounge window to the kitchen. When I got there the slippery floor made me fall over. And do you know what my reward was for being so clever? They put me in a cage, they pretend is called a playpen but I know a cage when I see one.

I admit I had been just a bit naughty by stealing Alice's Humpty Dumpty toy she had left on the carpet but not so naughty that I needed to live in a cage like the coal does. It is fun slowly moving around from one mummy to the other and it makes them laugh. Alice is getting close to crawling as well so we will soon be able to have races.

I think Romulus and Remus (the cats) were surprised to see me moving around. I managed to fall over near them and nearly bumped into them with my head. My mummies have moved all the dangerous things out of reach because they say "Nicola has no sense of danger" - what's danger?


March 26th - This week we went to the Monday group for babies and their mummies instead of the Thursday group. They have a big carpet on the floor so that babies like me can crawl around more easily but it does make my knees a bit dirty. It was very exciting because the puppets came to visit us and one of them pretended to eat my hand. That made me do the biggest laugh I have ever done.

Lots of the dangerous white stuff has been falling out of the sky but both daddies were very brave and went to work as normal. This time a little snow baby has come to live in our back garden. They just stand there all day which must be a bit boring for them.

I was a little bit naughty on the way home yesterday. We called in at the library and I got very cross because I was hungry and a bit cold and wanted to go home. I made so much noise that both mummies gave up trying to read and took me back to the car. As soon as I was there I went to sleep - I'm so wilful!

March 30th - Our special friend Cindy looked after us for quite a long time today because both mummies and daddies were away a something called a wedding. I don’t know why Alice and I were not allowed to go. Perhaps they thought that we might be smelly at the wrong time.

We like Cindy because she knows lots of new songs and she can do reading so she read some of our favourite books to us. Alice is very nearly crawling now and Cindy spent ages trying to get Alice to have her front and her back end off the ground at the same time. I’m an expert crawler except on the shiny kitchen floor where I keep falling over. Romulus and Remus like been stroked so with two babies and two cats Cindy was very busy.

We were sitting in our special chairs having our tea when the other grown-ups came home. Alice and I got very excited and made lots of noise and my apple food fell out of my mouth. I like Cindy but I love my mummy and daddy even more! She was given some more money for her piggy bank before she went home to her own house.

April 3rd - We went to a very special place this morning called a playground. I sat on Mummy's knee and we went on something called a swing. It was fun going backwards and forwards through the air. I made a bit of a fuss when it was Alice's turn because I didn't want to stop playing. To make me happy again we went on another toy called a roundabout. It was strange going around in a circle because Alice and Mummy Eve kept appearing and then disappearing again.

Our Mummies were very kind today! They helped us to eat some of our chocolate. They told us that babies don't like chocolate and so to stop us having to eat it they had to eat it themselves. Wasn't that kind of them!

For my lunch I tried something new to eat. It was a yellow coloured stick called a banana. I managed to get from the tray and into my mouth all on my own the very first time I tried to. I must be jolly clever. Alice has discovered a new eating game. She puts her hand into her porridge and then puts her hand into her mouth. Mummy says it makes her look like a cement mixer - whatever that is?


April 7th - We had lots of fun yesterday watching horses having a running race around a big field. We all pretended to be the owner of different horses and the person whose horse won the race got a special prize. I sat on Daddy's knee to watch the race but all my horses either fell over or stopped to have a rest. In the end Alice won the prize.

There was a robbery in our house on Friday! Somebody stole Alice's Humpty Dumpty toy and hid it in the kitchen. I don't know how it go all that way from the lounge - I expect it was the cats that did it. I am enjoying being able to crawl around but when the mummies are busy they put me in a cage like I was a fierce lion. We made the grown-ups laugh when Auntie Didi phoned. I got very confused looking for her because I could hear her voice but couldn't see her body anywhere. I was crawling round the room looking for her.


April 12th - We went shopping today which is always good to do. I get to see lots of new people and the lady on the check-out always says hello to me and to Alice. Somehow our Mummies forgot to bring the shopping list with them but they are so efficient that they could remember what we needed to buy. When we went past the yellow sticks (bananas) I got all excited because I knew that they were something that is yummy to eat. Then Mummy Ella made a mistake because she gave us each a banana to hold. Well we didn't know that you had to take the banana's coat off first so we both started chewing the end. It tasted very funny.

When we had finished the shopping we went to the café for a rest. Mummy looked at the pictures in the paper while we all had a drink. I was able to see another baby who was being very, very naughty. They did a jumbo cry and everybody was looking at them instead of looking at my very smart jumper. That wasn't fair was it?

April 17th - Yesterday Alice and I went swimming for the first time. It was a special hotter pool just for babies and their mummies and daddies. When mummy was undressing me I could hear lots of water splashing sounds so I thought I was going to have a bath but instead I was carried into the swimming pool. It seems that although I am not supposed to kick and splash in my bath that is exactly what I am supposed to do in the pool - it is all rather confusing for a small person like me.

We stayed there for about half an hour before Alice and I started to feel a bit cold. This made us feel sad so our mummies wrapped us up in a nice bright red towel and took us back to get dressed.

All the splashing must have made me tired because I fell asleep in the car and the next thing I remember was waking up in my cot when it was time for my tea. Tomorrow I have been invited to a party. The only trouble is that I don't know what a party is?


April 20th - A party is a place where other babies and little people steal your toys and knock you over and where strangers peer at you with no warning. I felt much safer and happier when I was sitting on my mummies knee just watching rather than trying to join in. Alice didn't seem to mind all the confusion and just crashed into other people without worrying about it. She must be much braver than me.

In my mouth a strange white thing is just starting to appear. Mummy says it is called a tooth and it means that I am starting to be more grown up. I like putting things into my mouth - yesterday it was Alice's foot while she was getting changed. It wasn't very tasty and I think I prefer bananas.

This weekend both our mummies are going to appear in a film so we are going to be looked after by our daddies. I hope it isn't the cricket DVD again!


April 24th - When we went shopping today Alice and I were each given a balloon by a lady. Our mummies tied them to our buggies so that they wouldn't blow away. It was fun hitting them with our hands because even a little bump made the balloon move a lot. It was so exciting playing that game that we did lots of laughing and that made people look at us.

When we got home we were allowed to play with the balloons in the lounge without them being tied up because it isn't windy there. We had a lovely time for half an hour but then one of them went pop and it scared me a lot and I had a cry. Luckily my mummy is good at making me happy so she put me in my high chair and gave me some banana to eat. After dinner a very old person came to see me. She lives near our house and she has white hair. I managed to give it a good pull to see if was real - it was!

April 29th - We had an exciting day yesterday. First we went out in our car and then we went for a ride in our buggies all the way up to the top of a big hill. At the top of this hill there was a funny round house called a folly There were lots of other people there as well for us to watch and make faces at. One of the people had a dog and the dog came over and stuck his nose right into my bottom. How rude! It was very windy up there and I think wind is strange because you can feel it but you cannot see it coming.

One the way back down we passed a field with lots of sheep and baby sheep in it. Some of the lambs were black so I suppose their mummies don't love them enough to give them a bath every day? Then the grown-ups did something very naughty. They bought an ice-cream from a van in the car park and didn't share it with Alice or me! They pretended that babies don't like ice-cream. It is a good job that they had a banana with them to keep me quiet.

Just before we went home I saw a new animal I hadn't seen before close-up. It was called a rabbit and was having a lie down in the road. It wasn't moving so perhaps it was having a little rest?


May 6th - It is the middle of the night. I'm sitting on mummies (Ella) knee helping her with the computer. She has just asked me a difficult question, "Nicola why wouldn't you go to sleep?"

My mouth hurts. These white things called teeth are more trouble than they are worth. They make me feel cross and sad. So I want a cuddle! I want you to stop looking at Facebook and make me better.

Yesterday we went to a safari park. The best thing we saw was lions. But it was a real swizz because they didn't roar. Not once. But when Mummy reads the animal book lions always roar. Lions eat people to but not at the safari park it seems. One lion walked past the car, he had a hairy head so hadn't shaved very well. I made a fierce face at him and he went away, I'm so tough.

Mummy Ella has just done her biggest smile because Mummy Eve has arrived to help. And so have the cats. They don't roar much either but they love me. Eve is stroking Ella head. But its my head that hurts.


May 12th - We all went to a book sale yesterday. I was allowed to go in without paying although the grown-ups did have to. I suppose this was because I'm more important? When we arrived I didn't know what was going on because I was in my buggy and all I could see was table legs and peoples' legs as well. I was starting to get bored when our mummies decided it would be better to park the buggies on the stage and to carry us instead. That was much better because I could see what was going on. There were lots and lots of old books in boxes and people were just looking at them. I think the books were quite boring because most of them didn't have any pictures. You cannot have a book without pictures!

A bit later I think Mummy Ella's arms were getting tired so she put me down on the stage. I sat there for ages pretending to read a book although I cannot do proper reading yet. Then I decided to escape so I started crawling away from her but she caught me. In the end Mummy Eve came back with lots of books - one of them was for me and another one was for Alice. Then we went home.

May 15th - Yesterday I did something new. Instead of using the baby bath I went into the big bath instead. That made me feel very important. What made it even better was that Mummy came in the bath with me and we played a few games. We had a lot of fun with the plastic duck, I had to make certain that Mummy was allowed to have a turn instead of keeping the duck all to myself.

I didn't like having my head washed and I did a bit of crying when Mummy was doing it. I don't mind the rest of me getting wet but I don't like the water running down my face.

Mummy told me today that quite soon I will be able to go a special place called a nursery when she and Mummy Ella go to work. My friend Cindy lives there and so I hope she will look after me. Alice will be coming with me to keep me company. I hope I will not miss my Mummy too much.

May 19th - I was clever and a bit naughty at the same time today. If Mummy helps me up onto my feet I can then stand on my own by holding onto to the little table in the lounge. I can then slowly move around it.

Mummy had left a cake on this table and do you know what I did? I put my hand into the middle of the chocolate cake and then crammed the whole handful into my mouth. That made Mummy jump up because the cake was dropping all over the place. I thought I was being jolly clever but Mummy wasn't very pleased. I then wiped my messy hand down the front of my little dress and that got me into more trouble. Oh dear.

How was I to know that cakes are only for grown-ups? Surely ice cream, Easter eggs and chocolate cake cannot just be for Mummies and Daddies? A little bit later when it was tea time I had my usual yellow stick (banana) and then I was given a little piece of cake as well. I think this means that she has forgiven me

May 24th - When I decide it is getting up time everybody else has to get up to!

I woke up early this morning and I was lying in my cot talking to the bear that guards me when I am asleep. I tried a new noise for the first time - "Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad". That had a big reaction from the grown ups! They told me that was proper talking and that I was a very clever girl. As a reward I was allowed to go into Mummy and Daddy's bed and they played some singing games with me. That was fun especially when I had another go at the Dad, Dad noise.

I don't think they can have enough money. They don't get to sleep in a bed on their own! They have to share a bed. Well I know that I would NOT want to share a bed with Alice however poor I was feeling.

May 27th - We had lots of fun today. We ate our dinner outside in the garden and it is the first time I have seen the daddies doing the cooking. For my lunch I had a yellow stick called a banana, two brown sticks called sausages and a green stick called cucumber. I didn't like the green stick very much so I kept spitting it out. Then I was given some ice cream which felt very funny inside my mouth because it was so cold.

I did lots of crawling round the garden and my knees have gone green like Shrek's. Mummy had been reading a Shrek book to me and although I don't understand all the words the pictures make me laugh. Alice has managed to do a bit of dad, dad, dad noise just like me. I think she is being a copy cat.

It is raining now so we have had to come indoors. If I'm lucky I might get a bit more of the chocolate cake for my tea. Mummy has explained about not taking a fistful of cake from right in the middle I hope I can remember!